Who Am I

Defining myself has never been so difficult.
I used to think that I am individualistic that I can control who I am.

Sociology has become an eye-opener for me.
In a way, it has frustrated me beyond belief that I don't have any control.
If I was unlucky enough to grow up in a poor neighborhood and go to a
poor school, the chances of me moving up is very slim.

However, we also learned about mindfulness. We learned how much others can influence us,
but I think that I often forget how much I can influence others. If I myself become more positive
then I can eventually inspire and affect people around me to do the same.

Be the change you want to be.
This was the repeating idea I got from being in sociology.

I am a sister. My little sister constantly looks up to me and learns from me.
The past years I've realized how scarily I affect her. If I like bbq sauce, the next month it becomes her favorite too. When I swear, she thinks its okay to do the same.

I am a sister, and as a sister I have a responsibility to be a good influence for my little sister. Sociology has
taught me that I really do have an affect on my sister and I should be more mindful of my own actions.

and this is only the beginning.
Sociology has made me realize many things I would've never realized by myself.
Little things can really make a difference. Little people can make a big difference.
And that's not exactly who I am yet, but it's who I'm going to be.

Crash

This week in class we saw the renowned movie, Crash.
This was my second time watching this movie, but I was able to learn a lot.
When I first watched this movie with my family, I wasn't focusing on race (and of course I didn't take sociology yet). All I realized was mistreatment and the thrill of the characters' intertwined lives.

While watching this movie for the second time, I was really able to focus on race. The stereotypes jumped out at me more. Also, since I knew what was going to happen, I was able to detect more clues.

I loved this movie because everyone's racial experiences seems so extreme, but it does happen. and sometimes it's even worse. Today we watched an Opera show with the cast sharing their own experiences. Their lives have all been touched because of racism at one point. They stressed that race is a problem we must divide and conquer. That it'll take a while to really eliminate it (if it ever can be eliminated),  but it must start with our own mindful actions.

In class we discussed if the ending was appropriate or not. I thought it was very appropriate. The fact that racism is a continuing cycle. That although we realize our mistakes, we may repeat it. Or sometimes it doesn't end up happy;it can result in a death or a murder. I loved how they had a physical crash at the very end of the movie. But they went a step further by showing that people who have been a victim of racism, still become racist. even though they know how it feels to be discriminated or stereotyped. I think that point is very much real. That when someone is getting stereotyped they are hurt and aghast. But, they don't notice it (or don't care) when they do the same to others.

This had me thinking of how mindful I must be. That I shouldn't perpetuate certain stereotypes (even if it's against my own race).

Actually, I have my own "crash"-like moment. Although it's not as severe, it proves how implicit racism is very present. Last year, I went in for grammar help to my english teacher. Now, english has always been my favorite subject and I know I'm good at it. Math has always been my weakest. I was in sophomore accelerated which proved my skill. However, despite me being in a higher level class, my teacher asked me "So when did you come here?" I was born here.
Implicit Racism. It hurt a lot.

It starts with ourselves. We can't expect to change racism when we ourselves aren't mindful and are spreading racism. Be mindful and extra careful.

Racism

This week in class we learned about race.
Race is not biological, but indeed a creation by society to label people.
People's race can be forever changing based on how they act.

But despite how race is not biological, many people believe it is. They think that race cannot change and if you're Asian, you're Asian. African then African.

I think Dave Chappelle portrays this ridiculous concept of race perfectly in a "racial draft". In this episode, he took several races "drafting" people to their race. Tiger Woods now "100% black" and many more. Race isn't a defined line. It's very flexible because the concept of "biological race" doesn't exist. It's all a perception.

We also saw how our society creates stereotypes for races. That asian are smart and slow while African Americans are loud. However although people may think that they aren't a racist, that shows that they arent an explicit racist. There's also an implicit racism. It's a type of racism we're not aware of. Its instilled in our brain that it's acceptable now.

This instilled racism is much more common than an explicit racism. But, if everyone begins to watch what they say, it's possible that in time this racism will not be around. It seems impossible, but we have gotten so far from the 1800s when people thought that African Americans aren't even human. If we all work together to try, we can do it.

Minimum

This week in class we continued learning about social class and the difficulty of moving into different classes.
And the difficulty did not lie just in the wealth, but also in the social culture.

But this week in class we focused on how unequal our wealth is in this world,
and people who are in low classes, stay in lower class; it's very hard to move up.

We played an unique type of monopoly to better understand this concept.
We had a high class, a upper middle, a lower middle and a low class.
The high class student started out with great wealth, and received more many when passing go.
The low class started out with very vey little and received minimum amount while passing go.
In the end of the game, no one changed classes. Te poor stayed poor while the rich became richer.
We realized how our system makes it almost impossible for a lower class to move up the ladder.

To study this idea even further, we watched an episode of "30 days" where we observed
a man living on minimum wage. We saw that he and his fiance were working multiple jobs just to pay their rent and eat rice and beans every day. They were only able to get furnitue and clothes thanks to the charities around that area.

The people around them were working in the same conditions as them, but many had much more families to support. Watching the couple struggle, but realizing much more families have it harder, made me angry and humble.

Our system obviously doesn't work. Minimum wage isn't helping the poor support themselves. It's not enough. And especially if an emegency occurs and they have to go to the hospital, they can't pay the fees. They don't have money for insurance. They are completly out of luck.

The social class system kind of crushes my hope. Although I am in the middle class, it'll be almost impossible to move up that ladder. It also made me angry that the rich are inherently rich. That although I may work my butt off the rich have an advantage--and that doesn't seem like an equal opportunity. But then again, the poor are at a greater disadvantage than I.

Society is complicated and there's no simple solution to our wealth distribution or social class.

Perceived

This week in class we saw a video of a man that stayed in prision for a couple of weeks.
Through the video, we were able to see how prisoners were treated and what they did in prison.
I was surprised to find out that they were required to do absolutely nothing-which was the biggest challenge.
The prisoners had to keep themselves entertained to get through the long days, weeks, months, years.
Many prisoners made up their minds to change their lives once they are released.
Sadly, the determined prisoners were unable to reach their goal which leads to another issue.

Should prison be a punishment or a rehabiliation for people? Our country had agreed it should be a rehabiliation but it's obviously not helping most people. People who have been to jail are a lot more likely to go back.

It's sad that our prison system is unhelpful and even unfair. People who are richer are able to avoid going to jail by hiring better lawyers, while the poorer people have no money to get out of jail. Our country should find a better jail system and slowly begin to change.

This week we also watched a movie on social class. We were able to see that social class may not even be about the money. That it's actually every little thing  person does, that shows what social class you're in.
For example, what foods you eat show what class youre in. Or how close you stand while you talk. All these little things show.

With the prison and social class, we learned that deviance is perceived. That how grave an act is perceived, and labeled by the community. How rich or poor someone thinksthey are is also perceived. A person may thnk that they are very poor compared to big buisness leaders, but in actuallity may be part of the higher class.

Since last week was Thanksgiving, I was able to think about this topic further. I live in a upper middle class neighborhood and go to a fairly wealthy school. Where everyone has smartphones, and use designer bags as their schoolbags. That spend twenty dollars each day for their lunch, or buy a five dollar latte every morning. Seeing all these people have made me feel a lot less rich. But I've failed to realize that compared to the rest of the country, and compared to rest of the world, i have so much to be thankful for. Maybe I should cut back on that extra coffee and spread my blessings to others.

It's Really Needed

A few Wednesdays ago I went back to the Harvest Food Pantry and Clothes Close in Evanston to volunteer.
I left my house at 4:50ish, but because of the terrible traffic, once again arrived at 6. I was greeted by the same leader, Pete. Sadly, he didn't recognize me, but that's understandable since there are so many changing volunteers every week.

There was an abundance of volunteers that day, so I wasn't needed at a certain station. But because of this abundance I was able to shadow regular volunteers at a couple of different stations. First, I started at the bagging area. Here, I shadowed Ana, a full time nurse who volunteers here every other week. I was told to put one jug of juice, one can of corn, one can of fruit, and one can of sloppy joe meat. I asked her where they get all the food--if the church supplies it. She said it's major brands donating their oversupply of food. For example, whole foods, target and panera are consistent donaters.

Next I followed someone in the line station. These people hold the bags of food for the people. I was amazed at how familiar the line volunteers were with the "customers". They were on a first name basis and treated them with so much respect. "Apple juice or Orange juice" "We have 3 choices of meat today...chicken breasts, hamburger patties, or ribs" It really felt like a personal grocery shopping assistant escorting all these people.

The night was busy, but not as busy as last week. Pete told me that the week before, they reached the highest number of families in one day:200. After there were no more families left, all the volunteers ate some leftover sweets with leftover milk (since these items spoil).

When I came home it was around 9pm. I was exhausted and not in the mood to do homework. But, something one "customer" said to me stuck. She said that volunteers are really needed and all the people who come here know and are grateful to them. Yes, at that time I didn't really feel like I was helping out much. Bagging a couple items, folding a couple clothes doesn't seem like a big deal. But volunteers are really needed. The interesting thing is, many regular volunteers used to be customers. They know what it's like to be in both positions and they know how a little help can go a long way. Because it really doses make a difference, it really is needed.

My Princess Boy

My Princess Boy.
My Princess Boy is a picture book about a young boy who likes to dress up like princesses and likes the color pink. However, in the book he is constantly laughed at for being himself.
I was reading his book to my second grade student today. The moment the plot developed, I couldn't help but connect this little boy to the sociology lesson we've been taught the past week. This boy was being mocked for being too 'girly'. Not only that, the parents were also laughed at by the society for letting and even encouraging their son to be "girly". Even more interestingly, I asked my tutor student what she thought of this boy. She simply answered "I don't like it".

This enforced the lesson we've been learning in sociology. From a young age boys are taught to be "manly". That they should not only participate in sports, but excel in that direction. They should hide their emotions-especially emotions of sadness. Yet, emotions like anger are acceptable to express-and even enouraged to do so.

The sociological influence these young boys receive have been seen to have a direct influence upon violence. Most school shootings the past years have been done by white, middle class, intelligent males that were pressured and made fun of their "girliness" or "gaybaiting".

Hearing such a strong dislike for that little princess boy from my student was a major wake up call. She's only six years old and she "doesn't like" this princess boy. This intolerance of princess boys will stay with them while growing up, and only make them less understanding of people like that.